Kaiser 4.20

This will go down in the books as a weekend of immense energetic output and purifying input.  The last 36 hours began with a gardening job in South Buffalo for a client I’ve had since 2011, a spring clean-up and replacement of yews with heather plants in full blossom.  Fishing my hands in and around rose bushes to prune dead wood and collect leaves left me scratched and bloodied.  I figure if we’re not proactively donating blood, some will be taken from us by default.  Linda was delighted by the finished product as a dark earthy premium mulch made the pink and white flowers in her front landscape “pop.”  A satisfied customer and a few extra dollars in my pocket set the stage for the remainder of the weekend as I made my way over to The Barn to collect some firewood before stopping back at home to clean-up, pack up and head south.

Upon arrival to Allegany State Park I was noticeably amped up in comparison to my friends who had been there since the day prior saturating and marinating in the natural bio-rhythms.  It took me a few hours to really settle down and just enjoy the moment seated by a roaring fire on a chill spring evening.  We had gathered a truck load of wood from what had fallen near the side of the road exerting significant energy with a very modest hand saw, designed for backpacking applications, to dice up the long limbs into burnable chunks.  There was a great deal of juvenile banter replete with laughter and total indulgence in the presence of high vibrational beings.  Our cabin on Kaiser trail was beside a babbling tributary and the sound of water rolling over rocks provided a steady background beat for the evening’s celebration in the moonlit forest.  We came up with a new philosophy for our farm vision, “Lower your expectations and up your game.”  In other words, set realistic goals and step up to the plate to see it through.  It was a hilarious insight supplied by Erin oozing with truth.

Before long I was nodding off seated by the fire and finally nestled into my mummy bag inside the cozy, wood-fired cabin for much needed slumber.  After several hours of deep sleep I arose to a smoldering camp fire, the remnants of a massive blaze that had been radiating heat to those gathered round.  Matt fired up the percolator and we enjoyed coffee as sunlight dappled through branches just beginning to break in bud.  Before long the women had rustled up a breakfast buffet and I happily fueled up on sustenance.   I could feel my body craving the nutrients and I made note that my knee had endured the intense physical activity of the previous day without any lingering pain.  My shoulders did burn a little, and yet still there seemed an unlimited reserve of energy.  We made our way to Thunder Rocks high in the Redhouse area of the park and I scaled up the outcrops of stone likely deposited thousands of years ago during the last glacial event.  I had last “bouldered” here nearly 20 years ago on a college club outing, and though my body is no longer an adolescent juggernaut, I felt strong and supple gripping small notches in the rock while propelling myself up to the top for a panoramic view.

I reflected upon purpose, and recognized my alignment with the unique expression of Creator I am.  I also thought about a talk I am scheduled to deliver for a group in a couple of weeks on the topic “Purpose is Power.”  I have about an hour time slot to fill and want to come up with something interactive for the audience.  Certainly, it will be my aim to have people go home with at least an appreciation for their life purpose, if not a clear understanding.  Originally, I have directed people interested in this spiritual practice to come up with 3 words as a primary step for distilling one’s life purpose, and eventually a mission statement.  Then it occurred to me there are 4 base pairs in DNA, as well as 4 directions and in most cafes tables seating 4 predominate the dining area.  And so now I am considering aligning this spiritual exercise with a scientific corollary, as purpose can be transformational, even to the point of re-arranging genetic material.

Upon arriving home I summoned more energy and proceeded to an epic cleaning blitz on the homestead including oil soap on the hardwood floors, full scrub down of all surfaces in the kitchen and bath, sweep and mop, before sauntering down to the lake to catch the sun just as the last sliver of shimmering light slipped below the horizon.  I marveled as the beach had been scoured clean by the advancing surge of the waves, leaving just a few of the dead fish that had littered the shoreline.  Among my “chores” on the docket for tomorrow after work are cleaning up trash on the 200 yard stretch of sand that we utilize for the summer.  I will need to mow the lawn for the first time this season at some point this week too.  Spring is for renewal, cleansing and growth emerging from dormant stems.  It is a productive season for the mind, body and spirit.

In common wealth,

SjK

Destruction breeds creation

I woke up with a swollen gland in the vicinity of the upper neck and jaw hinge, another symptom of something shifting in my physicality.  Despite a weariness and longing for more rest I pulled myself out of bed, grabbed a cup of coffee and began my day.  I worked remotely from a spare bedroom converted into a home office at my folks’ house as my truck received repairs at a shop nearby.  Admittedly, it was not the most productive day in terms of activity, although it did afford me an opportunity to experiment with telecommuting.  I think it could work once I adjust to the less structured environment.  I have no need for supervision to ensure engagement with work-related tasks as I actually tend to thrive in quite the opposite of a micro-managed culture.  However, I do appreciate being part of a team and learning  from those with more experience. I am grateful for the mentorship I’ve received with one of the best in the hiring consulting business as I’ve learned a great deal, mainly by osmosis as I eavesdrop on phone conversations with clients and candidates alike.  I can assure you that I never said I wanted to be a technology recruiter as a child, nor an admissions advisor, or substitute teacher or a landscape designer for that matter.  I am grateful for the many roles I’ve played in this life.

It wasn’t until late afternoon that I got word of the bloodshed in the streets of Boston from a friend’s social media status update.  Just a few minutes prior I noticed a piercing ring in my left ear, and I wondered who may have been thinking of me at that moment.  I was not yet convinced that the alleged explosions at the finish line of the marathon were for real, and then an email from our company President Bill advising us to cease any phone contact in and around Boston, where we do up to 80% of our recruiting.  He concluded the email with “this is not a joke” and upon a quick online search it was further confirmed that a horrific scene had indeed unfolded at a major annual event involving up to one half million people packed into the downtown corridor.  For a moment my heart sank realizing my ex-wife had run the race last year, and for all I know had returned for an encore performance.  I thought to text her and make sure she was ok, then I decided to let it be and let sleeping dogs lie.

Nonetheless, it is uncanny in a sense that I started this new gig and less than 2 months into it the market of our predominant focus absorbs a major trauma.  We have 3 partners running home-based offices in and around Boston, and I have connected with hundreds of people either born there, or relocated for employment as I inspire, empower and inform with love and goodness to all concerned.  It was like a shock wave sent out in this era of mass digital interconnectedness and I feel the loss as if it were my own.  We cannot stop bad things from happening, we can only respond, and responding with love is the most empowering option available.  As destruction breeds creation, we’re reminded how tragedy brings strangers close enough, if for only a moment, to realize we’re all in this together.  It is times like these that we learn to love again.

In common wealth,

SjK

Lost sailors

I just got back from my first hike of the season down to Sturgeon Point and back.  The beach littered with fish having washed ashore perhaps months ago when the first arctic winds forged ice berms now dwindled to eroding statues mimicking animals.  After taking in the panoramic view of the lake atop the break wall I made my way back, pausing to assist a couple of sailors in loading an aluminum craft onto the trailer.  The pull cord had snapped when they were sitting at about 38′ depth seeking out a school of lake perch, and upon rowing to shore there they were dragging the boat across the sand just a few hundred yards from the launch.  Just as we parted ways a cold northerly gust blew at my back reminding me that we are just a few weeks removed from winter.  The lake was nearly still as glass and the blue horizon fading to black made me realize those fellas were fortunate to have made it ashore before nightfall.

I actually didn’t make it out for the stroll until after 7 pm following a power nap on the sofa.  I had been fighting heavy eyelids most of the day at work following a very full weekend celebrating birthdays and ramping up the landscape season with a few estimates.   Friday evening was an absolute blast at Ashker’s on Elmwood Ave replete with live music and a spread of healthy, delicious hors-d’oeuvres washed down with a smooth cab-sauvignon.  I made some new acquaintances, in particular a lovely gal with a glorious singing voice, and enjoyed an insightful conversation on matters of the heart.  Before I knew it hours had passed in the solidarity of beloved companions and I was making my way home from the city to the rural neck of the woods.  My brother-in-law’s 40th birthday extravaganza was the following evening, resulting in a much later than normal sleeping hour, and to cap it off my cousin Evelyn’s second birthday yesterday afternoon.

I came home last evening to the company of friends capping off a truly abundant, albeit exhausting 3 day run.  It was a fortuitous visit in that I had a 38″ John Deere lawn tractor to unload from the bed of my truck, which Matt and I managed quite nicely.  A stiff southwesterly breeze kept us from lighting a fire on the beach, and so we gathered in the cozy living room to talk as the sunlight waned.  We plotted many more such outings as the weather pattern shifts into more favorable conditions for outdoor festivities.  The beach season is a joyous time of year, in stark contrast to the solitude of the winter season when most folks fly south, or at the very least retreat to more densely populated neighborhoods.  The solitary refinement afforded me over the last several months is paying dividends.  I have renewed clarity and conviction of purpose and a mission in my life for the first time in many years, including statements of intent for each.

Purpose: To be alive as the unique expression of Creator I am.

Mission: To inspire, empower and inform with love and goodness to all concerned.

In common wealth,

SjK

30 day review

So here I am on Good Friday laying low taking in NCAA tournament action whilst recuperating from yet another bout of gastroenteritis.  I have a theory that this second episode in a week is the result of contaminated wine, as it was a glass from the same bottle of Malbec prior to the onset on two consecutive occasions.  I’ve had a turkey sub for lunch and a piece of toast for my total repast over the last 48 hours.  I cannot say for certain the physical origin, and really the more penetrating question to ponder is why have I created this affliction in my path?  What is this disruption showing me in regards to my purpose?  I have been reflecting upon this intently and recall a wise teacher of mine once pointing out that when we get sick it is often a way of getting attention.  Over the last 10 plus years of my life I have rarely been sick, other than an occasional hangover from over-consumption of spirits.  And so I am reminded of the importance to nurture and give one self attention.  I had several invitations to come out for social functions this evening, yet I followed through by declining and restoring balance to self.  I already know I am the better for it.

Today marks the 30th day of employment at the new gig and it appears as though I’ve influenced my first “deal”, or hire, for a Boston-based client in the cloud-performance niche.  I spoke to the candidate Chris following his final interview with the CEO and from his perspective everything is in order for an offer.  He closed the interview asking for his start date and upon walking out with his future direct report, VP of Sales, he was all but certain he has it in the bag.  If in fact he does, it will result in a $1500  quarterly bonus for me, a small percentage of the $13K fee billable for the firm.  By all accounts it is win for all parties involved, and the monetary bonus is well, just a bonus.  Thirty days in I’ve had my share of doubts and struggles at times in this new role, although on the whole it has been a blessing in challenging me to review and refine my purpose.

About 8 years ago I had come up with a personal mission, or purpose, “To inspire, empower and educate.”  While this theme has been a guiding force in my path, both personally and professionally, I have at times deviated, or failed to remind myself on a sufficient basis to make it a habit.  In recent weeks I have been coaching a small group of select friends, or peers, on defining their life purpose.  This endeavor has upped the ante in terms of challenging me to become clearer on, and more aligned with mine.   I suspect the ensuing escalation of energies attuning my body vehicle to a higher vibration is also a contributing factor to the physiological imbalance of late.  And so wellness comes to mind, as does love, harmony and integrity, the so-called virtues of living a higher purpose than mere pursuit of material and earthly indulgences.  Hey it only took me 40 years to “get it”, and I’m looking forward to the next 40 delivering gifts too few will ever dare to open.

In common wealth,

SjK

True disruption means threatening your existing purpose and your past beliefs. Breakthrough purpose disrupts current ways of living.

Shock and awe

Despite a wicked wind chill with blowing snow on this the eve of the vernal equinox I made it outside for a Joe D Band workout, including an intermittent jog, the first time I’ve attempted a run since the end of last summer when I tore my meniscus.  It hasn’t bothered me of late as I’ve been stretching on a daily basis for several weeks now after an overly extended hiatus.  Tomorrow will be the true test of its strength against any latent soreness.  As I reflect back I remember how painful it had been requiring elevation and ice for a couple of weeks with limited range of motion.  Nothing motivates me more to take care of my body than when it is in disrepair.  Going forward I intend to be more proactive, and less reactive.

It was a sluggish day in the office fighting a chill for the better part of the afternoon.  I’m not sure if it has something to do with the paltry $2K we have on the board with just 8 days remaining in Q1 to secure placement fees.  The thermostat couldn’t have been a tick above 60 in the office.  After work I made it over to Verizon and was informed that I am not eligible until November for a promotional discount phone upgrade.  For those of you who have yet to hear I dropped my Droid into the port-o-potty at the tent party over the weekend (thankfully there were no terds deposited when I went to fish it out).   My wonderful neighbors have offered one of their used phones to replace mine, which I’ve been unable to resurrect after 3 days immersed in rice.  For those who may have text me in the interim this would explain why I haven’t responded.

After Verizon my next errand took me to Wegman’s to re-up on groceries, and I made my way to the cafe for a slice of veggie pizza to satiate my appetite.  As I sat down to dine I looked up at one of the televisions affixed to the wall and a news report was airing on this the 10th anniversary of the Iraqui War wherein Commander-in-Chief  George W. Bush ordered an invasion to oust then President Saddam Hussein.  The nation was still reeling from 9/11 collective PTSD and ripe for revenge.  Immediately I flashed back to that time in my life, a decade ago, recalling where I was and the circumstances hitherto.  I’d been living in a one bedroom apartment in Allentown, unemployed and without an automobile.  I walked once or twice weekly with an old backpack from college to the Lexington co-op for rations in a typical Buffalo winter.  I had been temping as a receptionist for an insurance firm nearby until they released me for challenging an irate customer.  I was not nearly as responsible for my thoughts and feelings back then having only just begun the practice.

And so here I am in a rebuilding, or reinventing phase once again in my life.  Seems to occur about every 10 years, give or take, and I’m curious what lies ahead as I, gulp, approach 50 in another decade.  But I will leave that up to the Universe and remain open to the mystery as I embrace what is right here and now.  We have only our intentions, or mission, in life to guide us, and if we don’t choose a purpose, we will live into one by default, often resulting in the victim role.  Any worthwhile endeavor in this human experience begins and ends with a mission.  Mine is to inspire, empower and educate toward self-actualization.  What is yours?

In common wealth,

SjK

“….Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” Robert Frost

 

Confessions of a match made

Feels so good to sleep, especially after the annual spring ahead last weekend disrupting normal routines for bedding down and arising in darkness.  To compound matters my plans for a relaxing night in had been thwarted when I discovered a 1 inch shard of metal had pierced one of my tires, resulting in an emergency trip to Pep Boys for service.  Make no mistake the extra hour of daylight at the end of the day is uplifting in anticipation of warmer weather to come.  It has been a decidedly wintry pattern since temps spiked to near 70 several days ago with snow showers and sub-freezing temps replacing the spring teaser as we approach the annual celebration of the christian missionary from Rome who allegedly “drove the snakes” out of Ireland.  Tonight I will make my 3rd annual guest appearance working the door at a huge tent party in the village of Williamsville.  Tomorrow Buffalo will host the third largest St. Patrick’s Day parade celebration in the nation, behind only New York City and a distant suburb of the sprawling metropolis.  An erstwhile teenage slave Padraig became known as the Apostle of Ireland for his work converting the Irish to Christianity.  It remains a mystery why it is said he drove out the snakes, as there are no known species of snake on the Emerald Isle.  One theory is a reference to the Druids who were known to have tattoos of the serpent on their arms.

It has been quite a couple of weeks since I last posted here in this web log now spanning well into Q1 of 2013.  I have 4 weeks at the new gig under my belt and by all accounts things are unfolding progressively as I learn a new industry.  I realize I am in an apprenticeship role with one of the best in the business as I listen in on many of Bill’s calls to both candidates and clients.  He has an uncanny ability to connect and relate to people on a professional and personal level, truly an intelligent dude who thinks on his toes.  He coached me after a call I made with a prospective candidate yesterday encouraging me to dig in a little deeper, even bullshit a bit more to develop rapport, something that comes natural to me and enabled me to excel as an admissions counselor.  The aim is to understand the person’s “why” for considering a move and how we may help them go from a “good spot” to a “great spot” in terms of their career path.  I love having a mentor, and I’ve had several on both a personal and professional basis as I’ve been practicing a spiritual path of growth in self-awareness and actualization.

While I’m not thrilled about sitting at a desk 8 hours a day, their is a learning curve that is engaging my mind in such a way as to enhance function, not only taking in immense amounts of data, but interpreting it in a meaningful way.  I am already gaining an appreciation of analyzing a candidate’s social media footprint, and when we have it, their resume to read between the lines.  Bill instructs to begin with their college graduation year, presuming they graduated, and if they didn’t then you already have something of a “red flag” as the majority of our clients prefer college-educated talented performers.  From there you look for the industries they’ve worked in, typically telecom and/or software for the profiles we search out, with some financial and retail often mixed in for good measure.  If they’ve been in the same vertical, or industry, for 10+ years without much growth in terms of sales quotas they are considered a “lifer”, which limits what we can do for them.  If they’ve had multiple short stints with a variety of employers (less than 3 years), it is also a red flag in terms of stability, although a pardon can be granted for those who happened to go through acquisitions, or perhaps personal challenges like death of a loved one, health complication or a divorce.  Bill has a knack for pulling out information that is not in print and I am learning this craft, which is invaluable when reaching out to initiate a fruitful dialogue with a candidate.  Sales is nothing more than identifying a value, or set of values in a candidate, and persuading them to take action.  And when you genuinely care about the outcome for all parties concerned you create win-win outcomes and never settle for less.

In other news of the bizarre and occult I’ve made acquaintance with a woman via a dating website and we have been on a couple of dates, including a lot of communication on the phone over the last several days.  It wasn’t until the night before last that we finally acknowledged the awkward truth in that we had crossed paths many years ago during an appearance on a reality TV show, Confessions of a Matchmaker.  When she had initially shared her name and a photo I was about 99% certain it was the same woman with whom I had been set up on a date for the so-called “reality show.”  I had been billed as the “perverted blogger”, and while I confess my blog back then did include more sultry details of my love life, it was far from the exaggerated spin for the purposes of shock value and ratings.  It was also far from the 50 Shades genre of composition.  The producers had coached us both in between tape, cajoling me to ramp up the innuendo to the point of completely offending my date, and upon return to the matchmaker for review of the date I was reamed out.  It was all quite comical and in retrospect I realize I have some acting skills.  Fortunately, all these years hence my counterpart understood that I was playing along as directed.

Yesterday, however, she sent me a text claiming that the distance between our current residences is simply too far to support a viable relationship.  While I agree with her that 48 miles is a bit of a haul, by no means would it be considered a long-distance gig.  It is my suspicion that she got scared as we have really dug in on a deep level in our correspondence, and though there has been no physical intimacy, the connection is strong.  Nonetheless, when two Libras come together you can expect that one or the other is going to flake out at some stage, ever the indecisive, free-spirits that we are by nature.  It’s funny in reflection of the whole thing as clearly something has come back around that was left undone.  During production the show was actually called “Find Love TV”,  not nearly as catchy a title for the entertainment sector, although much more endearing to aspiring romantics.  Perhaps she will reconsider her decision, or perhaps we’ve simply tied up a loose metaphysical end?  I wasn’t sold on a future together anyway, especially the farm vision, which is a major focal point for me.  The old me would fret and criticize and cogitate over the whole ordeal, whilst the new me understands that it aint nothing til you call it.  I’m in a good spot right now, and am only going to bust a move to a great spot.

In common wealth,

SjK

Twin Flames

The last few days have seen something of a throwback to my early college years with late night debauchery over the weekend resulting in one tuckered out dude contending with a nasty stomach ache.  It is finally settling down after copious cups of lemon ginger tea, some healthy food and a does of apple cider vinegar.  I asked the boss if I could leave early and make up the hours on the weekend, to which he agreed.  It is a blessing to have some flexibility on the job.  Yesterday I spent the bulk of the day intermittently nodding off and toughing out some wicked stomach cramps.  I can only surmise that it is inflammation as a direct result of my behavior, including an awful lack of sleep for two consecutive nights.  A wise friend did once say, “If you’re going to be dumb, you better be tough.”

The weekend kicked off innocently enough meeting up Friday after work with my sister, her husband, my cousin and my father to take in a Buffalo Bandit’s game.  Despite a valiant effort the good guys lost in Overtime to the Philadelphia Wings who came back from a 4 goal deficit to steal a hard fought win on the road.  After the game I was invited back to my sister’s to continue the festivities, including a home brew of apple pie moonshine made by my brother-in-law that was passed around sipping from a mason jar whilst playing on the Kinect.  I won the 100 meter dash, but came in last at bowling.  I did a rather sweet rendition of Lady Gaga’s Po-po-po-pokerface, yet abstained from attempting Michael Jackson’s Thriller.  By the time the dust settled I wasn’t home in bed until 3 am, only to rise fairly early to grab some breakfast and head out the door.

My partner in epic crime, Ben and I vended at a girl’s night out party in Geneva.  He was marketing his nutritional weight loss shakes and I was doing demos with the Joe D Bands.  We had a decent response to our table, although being 2 of just 3 men in the room didn’t hurt our cause.  It quickly became clear that most of the women in attendance at the event were more about the ladies night out energy than anything to do with health and wellness as the booze was flowing.  The hours whizzed by and before long the dance floor was bumping with intoxicated women shaking their moneymakers.  At one point as I stood at the bar chatting it up with a pretty blonde serving up stiff ones, I was approached by a couple of ladies who insisted on pointing out the obvious, referring to me as a “weiner” in the room.  At another interval I was spanked on the behind, grabbed a couple of times and what I believe to be a beer bottle made contact.  The attention was a bit extreme, even for this bachelor.

Eventually we were politely asked to leave the banquet room as some of the ladies didn’t appreciate the weiners in the room.  Ben and I migrated to the hotel bar and continued to enjoy the plethora of female company.  Somehow we wound up crashing in the same bed with a pair of women.  While nothing sexual occurred, there was a paucity of sleep to be had as daylight soon poked through the curtains.  I felt like a truck had hit me and after several cups of coffee intermixed with water we got out of Dodge.  While it was technically a business trip, without a doubt there was pleasure mixed into the fold.  The whole affair took me back 20 years to a time in my life when there was minimal responsibility and maximum trouble to be had.

And so here I am late on a Monday evening logging into this web log once again reflecting on the transition from one lifestyle to the next.  As much as I may enjoy the freedom and stimulation of being a bachelor I feel ready to share my life in an exclusive way with a partner, a soul mate, or perhaps a twin flame.  In this regard I would embrace “settling down” to focus upon the healing and transformation journey with a mate.  I’ve been straddling two worlds, or perhaps universes for many years, and as Led Zeppelin once sang there’s still time to change the road you’re on.  To connect in mind, body and spirit is a precious and rare phenomena.  I do not require a partner for survival as I am a self-sufficient soul; however, to take my path to another level I do feel as though partnership is key.  I have learned and grown so much through relationship, embracing equally the challenge and support along the way.

In common wealth,

SjK